Representing young people (10-17) who are being investigated for or charged with sexual assault or sexual misconduct comes with a whole host of unique challenges, which is why families must hire an attorney who understands the subtlety of the laws that govern juvenile sexual misconduct in Colorado.
When I represent a child accused of sexual misconduct, my first step is to build rapport with the young person and to determine their level of understanding of essential sex education topics. These initial conversations cover what they have learned in formal classes in school (generally next to nothing), and we also discuss other sources of information like the internet, conversations with their peers, and their parents. Over the years, I facilitated countless conversations with young people on topics ranging from pornography, hookups, and consent.
Sometimes, these conversations involve a youth’s parents. But, even if the youth doesn’t want their parents present, I regularly have a separate meeting with my client’s parent to talk about youth sexuality more generally. Talking to a teenager about their sexuality can be awkward, and a 2019 study revealed that 63 percent of teen boys reported their parents had never talked to them about basic sexual topics such as contraception. So, it is not surprising that many youths report to me that many of them have never had an in-depth conversation with their parents about sexual education topics. For this reason, when I talk to parents of children identified as male who are charged with sexual misconduct, I regularly recommend they read Boys and Sex by Peggy Orenstein. Orenstein spent years speaking to young men about a whole host of topics, including pornography as the new sex education, locker room talk, hookup culture, and their experiences as both perpetrators and victims of sexual violence. The resulting book is an un-put-downable look into the struggles and experiences of boys and young men of today.
Families who have a child accused of sexual assault or misconduct are forced into a situation where they must talk with their child about topics that many have avoided for years. But what I have seen in my ten years facilitating this complicated conversation is that the majority of the youth I represent, whether they are innocent or guilty, come out on the other side of a sexual assault allegation having learned valuable lessons about their sexuality and having opened commitment to speaking with their parents, guardians, and loved ones about conversations that they historically treated at taboo.
